I look again in the past. Love was treated so much differently by me. Immaturely used, stupidly used. I look farther. Events that occurred were what i thought. My instincts told me what to do but did i follow them? At first yes but later on no. If i had followed it the outcome to where i am now may have been completely different. But will that change been worth it? It would've. Where i am now, love fuels me. My love for my friends. My yearning to help them. The special care i have for that one person. I look farther back then. My friend had problems..i didn't listen to him when he needed help. I regret that to this day. Every event teaches you something. Sometimes in pieces and sometimes at full force. My lesson i learned overtime "always keep your friends close to you, always be there for them, never let them go". First it was a friend i had rejected. Then it was my father whom past away....the effect if you disconnect yourself from everyone. Then it was that one person, one whom i care for most. Something that i do have that motivation and care to help. That i can actually help. The finishing touch, smoothing out the rough edges, making the lesson go at full effect. I thank her, she has yet to realize the depth of my gratitude and my love for her. A new year with a new view. The potential to actually make a difference in my current life and help those who are in need. A new start to a new life.